Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Snowbat on Fri Apr 19, 2013 1:40 pm

I agree with you. But as you may have already noticed, I'm way too self-concious and I care way too much about what people think of me.
Probably comes from my childhood.
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Binerexis on Fri Apr 19, 2013 2:27 pm

Then cut it out.
"Everyone just shut up and enjoy your arena."
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Gh0st.IRE on Fri Apr 19, 2013 3:25 pm

I don't draw the line at women. I'll hold the door for pretty much anything that's coming through behind me.
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Snowbat on Fri Apr 19, 2013 5:20 pm

Binerexis wrote:Then cut it out.

Okay. You want me to solve the problem in North Korea and fix global warming and famine too? If it was this easy, I would have done it already.
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Binerexis on Fri Apr 19, 2013 8:38 pm

Snowbat wrote:
Binerexis wrote:Then cut it out.

You want me to solve the problem in North Korea and fix global warming and famine too?


That'd be AWESOME! Get right on it, man!
"Everyone just shut up and enjoy your arena."
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Gh0st.IRE on Sat Apr 20, 2013 12:27 pm

Can we stick on topic please? :wink:
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Little_Devil on Sun Apr 21, 2013 9:44 am

Man raised by Woman has attitude of be courteous towards women; go figure :P

Being courteous towards someone else is more inherent in the male nature, and females expect it, this probably stems back aeons in time to when Man went hunting the animals and brought food back to the female that was pregnant or had young children.

Modern Women tend to be, just as some men are, in a varying state between gracious and down right ignorant. You see it when it comes to driving, the majority of males that are courteous are men, and very few women are, since they expect that kind of behaviour from a man. Its the same with any other way of life, women expect and don't acknowledge in many cases, whereas men expect, as they should, some kind of acknowledgement of their graciousness, even a thank you.

As I said most women particularly drivers are never courteous and never acknowledge the courtesy done to them. That doesn't mean that all women are like this, just the vast majority these days. Where you do see a difference is in a relationship, and even that varies :)
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Ama_ on Sat Apr 27, 2013 8:18 am

I personally expect everyone to be respectful to everyone in every situation.

I remember having argued with an older woman because I didn't read her mind and see she wanted me to get off my seat on the bus for her. Although I was younger than her I also happen to have multiple muscular "injuries" that kinda prevent me from holding heavy charges and things like that and had a million pieces of luggage to carry from my place to the train station. But yeah, she was older, so she deserved the seat. And once I managed to get up from my seat, she kept blabbering about how disrespectful younger people were today.

Some people take respect for granted and something natural, maybe some women expect men to be holding doors for them and giving them their coat etc, some see it as an offense, I personally see it as a proof of respect and usually acknowledge it when someone holds the door for me, by saying thank you, if possible with a smile. In return I am most of the time very courteous and polite, except if someone messes too much with me, may it be in everyday situations, while driving or even when playing online.
I go by one simple rule: be respectful towards people and expect the same in return (even though I know it's not always possible), and I try not to care about what people think about it.

As for the Nice Guy theory, I'd say it's not only a matter of behavior (I personally don't agree with the selfish gene theory PedalBin mentioned), but also a fact that nowadays our society sexualises everything, including behaviors that apparently have a secret motivation other than simply having some values and applying them.


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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby re# Skilgannon on Sun Apr 28, 2013 1:28 pm

Little_Devil wrote:As I said most women particularly drivers are never courteous and never acknowledge the courtesy done to them. That doesn't mean that all women are like this, just the vast majority these days. Where you do see a difference is in a relationship, and even that varies :)


I just went out in the car and thought I would put this theory to the test as I was going down several roads where you have to give way multiple times due to shit parking

on my round trip I gave way to 20 drivers

of those 20

7 out of 8 women said thank you or acknowledged that I had given way (mix of ages)
4 young lads (ie under 30) also acknowledged or gave thanks
1 older male blew me a kiss (ok ok it was my father LOL!)
1 male white can driver ignored me (age approx 50's)
1 of the 8 women didn't say thanks but had a screaming child in the car
2 older men (60+) gave me a smile and a wave
3 mid range aged men (30-40) just carried on driving, 1 in a BMW, 1 in an Aston Martin (know who he is and he is an ignorant twat) and 1 in a family car


so in short

7 out of 8 women were courteous
4 out of 12 men weren't

I know that isn't scientific in any way at all but shows that round here its the more affluent males who are ignorant gits, younger men tend to be fine, women are usually fine as well and my Daddy loves me :D
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Berath on Sun Apr 28, 2013 5:35 pm

Somehow I'm not surprised at your results.

It's a random and unscientific survey but does prove that one person's experiences are not necessarily the same as anothers and sweeping generalisations made on those experiences may not be always valid.

(cute story about your Dad by the way :D )
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Little_Devil on Sun Apr 28, 2013 7:44 pm

I'm not surprised at those results either, a woman being courteous towards another woman is not surprising, however if you were male, those same 7 women would probably expect it, and not acknowledge you :)

Should point out that there are a breed of drivers that are just twats, and these can be categorised by what they drive, again not all are like this, just the majority.
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BMW, Mercedes, Jaguar, Land rover or any big 4x4 car, and they have the right to be on the road, you don't.
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Aceo on Sun Apr 28, 2013 8:48 pm

Just to clear up. When women are bad drivers it's because they're women and applies to all; when men are, it's nothing to do with that but is in fact the car that they drive?


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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby BelovedKiller on Tue Apr 30, 2013 9:42 am

Aceo wrote:Just to clear up. When women are bad drivers it's because they're women and applies to all; when men are, it's nothing to do with that but is in fact the car that they drive?


How did this thread get from Chivalry to sexism on the roads?
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Aceo on Tue Apr 30, 2013 10:12 am

Little_Devil wrote:Man raised by Woman has attitude of be courteous towards women; go figure :P

Being courteous towards someone else is more inherent in the male nature, and females expect it, this probably stems back aeons in time to when Man went hunting the animals and brought food back to the female that was pregnant or had young children.

Modern Women tend to be, just as some men are, in a varying state between gracious and down right ignorant. You see it when it comes to driving, the majority of males that are courteous are men, and very few women are, since they expect that kind of behaviour from a man. Its the same with any other way of life, women expect and don't acknowledge in many cases, whereas men expect, as they should, some kind of acknowledgement of their graciousness, even a thank you.

As I said most women particularly drivers are never courteous and never acknowledge the courtesy done to them. That doesn't mean that all women are like this, just the vast majority these days. Where you do see a difference is in a relationship, and even that varies :)


Right here.


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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby BelovedKiller on Tue Apr 30, 2013 10:21 am

Aceo wrote:
Little_Devil wrote::)


Right here.


He merely stated the point, he didn't make a sexist remark..
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Binerexis on Tue Apr 30, 2013 11:26 am

A sweeping generalisation based on gender was made without any concrete sources.
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Gh0st.IRE on Tue Apr 30, 2013 4:32 pm

Please stay on topic. This thread is about Chivalry, not sexism. If you're interested there is already a thread about Online Sexism. If you wish to discuss regular sexism, start a new thread.
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Little_Devil on Wed May 01, 2013 11:16 pm

Binerexis wrote:A sweeping generalisation based on gender was made without any concrete sources.


No sweeping generalisations were made, just observations as to who is likely to be more courteous to another person, and verified by skilgannon

Please note the title of the thread lol

Being chilvalrous as a men towards women
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Binerexis on Thu May 02, 2013 12:54 am

I'd say that your statement of "As I said most women particularly drivers are never courteous and never acknowledge the courtesy done to them. That doesn't mean that all women are like this, just the vast majority these days." was the opposite of what Skil found but whatever.
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Re: Being chilvalrous as a men towards women

Postby Little_Devil on Thu May 02, 2013 9:56 am

What skil found was female to female evidence of courtesy, the thread is about chivalry of men towards women. I was merely pointing out that the inverse is not true, and that females tend to expect a male to be courteous without having to reciprocate or to acknowledge chivalry done to them.

From the aspect of a female being courteous towards both male and female, and an acknowledgement being returned.
so in short

7 out of 8 women were courteous
4 out of 12 men weren't


I could point out that I don't mind, and it won't stop me being courteous towards other people regardless of whether they acknowledge it or not, all it shows is how lame the other person is :P
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